On WoW Couples

Friday, February 17, 2012
Hi, I'm Karegina and I have a confession.  I am half of a ... WoW couple.

It didn't used to be like this.  In the beginning, I played by myself.  My husband hated WoW and tolerated the hours I would dedicate to this game.  At the time, I didn't raid.  I leveled alt, after alt, after alt.  None of them were geared well, nor even in gear that matched.  (My Alliance druid had int/spirit gear as well as str/stam gear AND agil/stam gear.)  However, I was having a good time and really, isn't that what matters?

Then, about 2 years (or so) after I started playing, my husband asked me if I would like it if he would start playing.  I squeed and jumped around and we installed the discs on his computer (both Vanilla and BC) and he rolled a gnome warrior.  By now, I was raiding a little in Kara as my human mage.  So, I'd level with him for a while and then flip over for raid.  This went on for a couple months but then a drama bomb was dropped in our guild and our RL best friends started to play.  So, off we went to "my" Horde server and we rerolled Horde.

At first, there was only 5 of us.  All real life friends, all within about 10 minutes of each other.  We leveled to 70 and started to raid.  It was nice because in our group, we had 2 tanks and 2 healers.  Who need anyone else??  As time went on, we ended up leaving our 'starter group' and branching out into different guilds.  However, by the end of BC, we were all back together again in 1 guild.

Throughout Wrath, we raided as a group.  By now, we had us 5, plus a extra dps that we knew from a MUD, my best friend's sister, another dps/tank that we knew from the same MUD and a handful of other people we also knew from outside the game.  We had our own guild, so we could run how we liked, when we liked.  It was very nice for us.

However, everyone had little quirks.  I always wanted to run my first new dungeon with my RL friends first.  Husband didn't care what happened with who as long as he got to go.  Our best friends didn't have quirks that I can remember but my memory is fuzzy.

During ICC, I was facing really bad burn out.  I didn't want to raid anymore.  So I stepped back from raiding and just took a break.  However, I didn't know that husband was also facing burnout and that he was relying on me to help him out while he was running the 25 man raids.  One night, someone made an offhand comment that made my usually placid and calm husband fly into a rage.  He jumped up from his desk, screaming about raid and then stormed off into the living room.  I was on a different server, facing burn out of my own, and did not react well to my husband suddenly screaming and thumping off.  So I did something I shouldn't have.  I logged into WoW and told the guild that they were assholes (or something) and that Husband didn't deserve this and some other things that I can't remember.  Then, I logged off and went to find him.

Turns out he'd punched a wall in his frustration and had fractured his hand.  So, off we went to Urgent Care and we had a long talk.  He admitted he had been relying on me too much and that it never should have gotten this far.  We were there for hours (typical for ER/Urgent Care situations) so we were able to hash everything out.  I came back to raiding, albeit reluctantly, but we finished up ICC and Wrath.

We aren't a couple that needs to spend 24/7 in game together.  After that night, we both realized that we were letting the game get to us a little too much.  This isn't to say we stopped letting the game get to us but we knew that we could talk about it before it got to be too much.

During the whole guild transfer situation, we had hours and hours of discussion.  Would we stay together and try to raid together?  Would we transfer off alone?  Should we even keep playing?  And the big question, will anyone even take the two of us together?  We had been so spoiled with our own guild where we were both officers and he was the raid leader and I was one of 2 and a half healers.

Neither of us wanted any of the prospective guilds we thought about to think that they were getting one good player and one player that couldn't find their ass with both hands.  And the thought that really burned me up was that I would automatically be assumed to be the bad player.  I like to think I'm a good player.  I read up on my class and chosen role.  I bring my own consumables and water.  I have a leg up on people because I have a walking, talking raid directory sitting within 3 feet of me.  So, I get my own research PLUS the research he does.

The guild we landed in has other WoW couples.  And I love it.  The guild is serious about progression but not to the extent of not being fun.  I love seeing our bear druid and knowing that soon her hubby will log on.  I love that our guild has learned that 9 times out of 10, if one of us logs on, the other isn't far behind.

And honestly, I love that my husband can still go do PVP and arenas here.  All those things he did without me, he can still do them now!  I spend hours prospecting ore, crafting rings/necklaces and then disenchanting them.  We do our dailies together, and while the last few days have been different, we generally go to bed at the same time.  (I seem to have a little stomach flu or food poisoning.)

I think that anyone would be lucky to have a couple like us.  Even if I am a little hard to handle sometimes!


  1. Saga said...:

    I have no issue with raiding couples, I've met several during my years and only once have they ever presented a problem. However, I don't think the couple in question was a couple problem as much as a person problem, and when one left the other just followed.

    As an officer (often in charge of recruitment) I never turn couples down on their applications. Guilds who do are doing themselves a disfavour I think. Couples are usually great, because they'll usually both show up, or tell you when they're not. And if only one shows, you can always find out why the other isn't. They're also coordinated since they're in the same room/house.

    I've been reading a lot about couples in WoW lately, and I just don't see the downsides. Maybe I've just been lucky with the couples I've dealt with; or they're not as bad as people like to make them out to be ;)

  1. Karegina said...:

    I see the people who don't take couples as the same kind of people who don't accept females. IE, idiots. :)

    I do know that when we were on the recruiting end of this, we loved couples. But as I said, we were at least 2 raiding couples in our guild.

    And to be honest, I've heard more good then bad (since I live the good) but because there's been so much out there about WoW Couples, I had to write something. It keeps hitting my brain!!

  1. Saga said...:

    Oh, don't get he started on the guilds who don't accept females. Because they "cause drama".. Like, what? I've seen more drama from males than females while playing this game.. I'm not saying that there aren't females out there who cause drama, but again - it's a person thing, not a gender thing.

    And there's definitely more good than bad with couples. Let's just hope more people will realise it!

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